I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
