She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize