Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize