Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize