I'm sorry my penis didn't work
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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