I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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