Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
