talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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