Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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