actually, I'm a sock model
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I fill condoms, not promises.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Randomize