I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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