What a fucking waste of an outfit
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
