he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
