Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize