Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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