I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
