I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
