Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize