try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I need to align my fucking chakras
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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