But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize