i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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