What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
