my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
