when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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