so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
