Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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