he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
i've created a new STD.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
