No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
