I look better un-naked...
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
