This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
