This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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