Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
