Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
