The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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