Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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