I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
