Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize