I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize