There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
