I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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