im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I am mentally ready for anal.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize