would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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