Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
