Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
