ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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