I feel great
I just peed on a car
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
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