Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
please come you make the beer taste better
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
