My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
