Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize