According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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