I think i sorta joined a cult last night
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Randomize
